Hard Day's Knight (Black Knight Chronicles) Page 16

  I stayed there for a minute staring at where she’d been, until Greg came over, put an arm around my shoulders, and said, “She’s so out of your league it’s not even funny. Now go to bed.” And I did, feeling my years in a rare mood of introspection. I was gonna have to bite somebody tomorrow night. Just to make me feel better, if nothing else.

  Chapter 29

  I slept, and of course I dreamt. I suppose it’s inevitable. Fat people dream about being skinny, ugly people dream about winning beauty contests, poor people dream about winning the lottery. I dreamt about being alive. Alive and walking along a beach with a certain very attractive detective. She was tall, lean like a panther, with her hair down and blowing in the breeze off the ocean. Sabrina wore a bikini, and my subconscious had obviously paid more attention to her than I had thought, because my imagination had certainly filled in a few blanks as to what she looked like under her shoulder holster. And of course she still wore her Sig on her hip, which only added to the mental image.

  I slept for a long time, almost to dusk, and when I woke up, I felt like I’d barely gotten any rest at all. Great, I thought, I love going into a huge fight after a crappy day’s rest. I should have just bitten her and gotten it out of the way. I walked into the living room, and found Greg still sitting at his computer. It wasn’t that unusual for me to come out and find him facedown on the keyboard, but this time he was still awake.

  “Busy night in the World of Warcraft?” I asked as I rummaged in the crisper for breakfast.

  “I think I know what the plan is for tonight.” He replied in a monotone. He’d obviously slept very little, if at all.

  “Yeah, dude. We had that covered before we went to bed. We wait here for the hot cop chick, then we find the ugly demon-possessed chick, kick her butt back to Hell, and then hopefully I get to second base with the hot cop chick.” I jumped over the back of the sofa and landed with my feet on the coffee table. Sometimes the enhanced agility that came with being undead came in handy.

  “Don’t you think the hot cop chick might have something to say about that?” Sabrina’s voice came from the stairs and not for the first time I wondered why mental telepathy didn’t come with all the other fringe vamp benefits.

  “Nah,” I replied, trying to salvage any measure of my self-respect, “Once we save the world there’s no way she’ll be able to resist my charms. Breakfast?” I held the blood bag out to her.

  “No thanks, I ate on the way over. And I have faith in my ability to resist your charms. And in the necklace I bought this morning.” With that, she fished a delicate cross out of her shirt and dangled it from her fingertips.

  “That’s just mean.” I leaned back on the sofa and finished my breakfast. “G, what did you mean about a plan?”

  “I think I know what she’s up to.” He said flatly. I was gonna have to spike his next meal with Red Bull or he’d be useless in the fight to come. Then what he said registered and I was over his shoulder in a matter of seconds.

  “Say what? You’ve figured out her plan? How?”

  “I don’t think you care or could possibly understand the explanation, so I’m going to skip the how part of your question. And yes, I think I know what she’s going to do, and how to find her.”

  “Would you like to share this information with the rest of the class, Mr. Knightwood?” I asked as calmly as I could.

  “Sure. When you went to bed, I had no idea how to figure out what her next step was going to be. So I went back to her first steps to see if I could come up with some other commonality between the abductions. And after a couple of false starts, I came up with the answer – school staff.”

  “Huh?” I asked. “That doesn’t make any sense, bro. Teachers only teach at one school. How could someone work at a dozen different schools?”

  “She doesn’t. At least not permanently.”

  “Still lost, man.” I wasn’t getting what he was giving me at all. He looked at me like he was talking to his retarded kid brother, which maybe in a sense he was. He took a deep breath and looked over at Sabrina.

  “You got it, right? I’m not the only person in the room with two brain cells to rub together.”

  “Don’t worry, Greg. I got it. Jimmy’s the only moron on the team.”

  “So do you two mind enlightening said moron, or should I just wait until we get wherever you’ve figured out that we’re going and hit things when you tell me to.” I was getting a little tired of their superior attitude, no matter how well-deserved it was.

  “Happy to help, old buddy. Happy to help. Our bad guy, or in this case, girl, is a substitute teacher. When I ran the lists of substitute teachers in the system against the abductions, one name popped out as being at each school right around the date of the abductions. Janet Randell. She’s been a sub for two years now since losing her job as a teacher’s aide to budget cuts. She was at every single school the day of or the day before a kid went missing. So I did a little work to find out where she was today.”

  “And where was she?” Sabrina asked.

  “That’s where things got a little tricky. She wasn’t working anywhere in the district today. But I knew she would be somewhere, and it would be at a decent-sized school, since she needed a dozen victims in short order. So I widened my search, and found her at Holy Trinity.” He leaned back in his chair, arms crossed over his vast belly. Then he abruptly sat up straight as the chair threatened to tip over backwards and deposit his fat carcass on the floor.

  “But how could she know she’d be teaching today? And how could she guarantee that she’d be at a large enough school to find a dozen likely victims?” Sabrina asked. I was glad she did the asking. Not only did it save me the trouble, but Greg wasn’t razzing her for not figuring everything out ahead of time.

  “I believe she created a vacancy. The Home Ec teacher at Holy Trinity was found dead in her apartment last night. I believe that our Janet killed the teacher and set herself up as the sub on call so she could be close to her victims. So that gives us a location to start with.”

  “And end with.” I interjected. “Holy Trinity is a pretty tightly wound place, the kind of school that teaches Book Burning 101 and pickets rock concerts. Every Halloween they hold a religious Fall Carnival to ‘combat the Satanic holiday’s influence on our children,’ or something like that. The point is, they’ll be hosting this Carnival tonight at the school gym, and there will be hundreds of kids and parents there. If the final summoning needs a sacrificial component, then that would be the perfect place to do it.” I looked around and both of them were staring at me, slack-jawed. “What? I can occasionally come up with something more profound than ‘Hulk Smash.’”

  “Yeah,” Greg said. “But not usually when it matters. So we concentrate on the Fall Carnival, because that’s where she’ll most likely be. And we go over there, ruin her plans, and save the world from something we don’t really understand.”

  “What if we’re wrong?” Sabrina looked from Greg to me and back again. “I think it sounds like a good plan. And all the logic works. And it makes perfect sense. But life isn’t always logical and doesn’t always make any sense. So what if we’re wrong? What happens then?”

  “Then we all die.” I turned to the stairs, and was absolutely stunned at what was standing there. Phil was there, but it wasn’t the Phil I’d come to know and despise. This was Zepheril, the fallen angel, accompanied by Lilith, the first wife of Adam. Phil had his wings on display, and Lilith had on an outfit that put almost all of her on display. They looked like extras at a fetish party, only better armed. Phil had black leather pants and a sword belt with a sword on it. Lilith wore thigh-high boots with come-hither heels, a black leather miniskirt and a leather jacket unzipped enough for me to see that it was apparently the only thing she had on other than a bra. And a shoulder holster. The first guy to build a combo bra/shoulder rig that’s comfortable will make a mint.

  Not feeling particularly eloquent, I blurted, “What the hell are you two doing here?�
�� Lilith smirked and came over to me, oozing sex with every step. As she approached, I could feel the room go hot and cold all at the same time, and out of the corner of my eye I could see she was having a similar effect on Greg. Sabrina just looked grumpy.

  “Why, we’re here to help, little vampire. If tonight goes poorly for you, it could go very, very poorly for us.” She spoke into my ears in a low voice, almost a purr, and I remembered the feeling of her blood pulsing through my veins. It took everything I had to pull back and look at her.

  I very carefully looked directly in her eyes, which seemed about the only safe place I could look at on her. “What do you mean, poorly for you?”

  She chuckled and pulled back from me, giving Sabrina a glance as she crossed back towards the door. “You have no idea what awaits you in the afterlife, little vampire, if you even have one. Zepheril and I, however, know exactly what is waiting for us. And that’s why we have no interest in bringing about the end of our lives anytime soon. Because what we have in store is unpleasant beyond your wildest dreams. So it’s in our best interests to keep the fabric of the universe intact for a little longer, no matter how amusing it might be to allow your necromantic little teacher’s plan to come to fruition. So let’s go.”

  “Oh, hell no!” Sabrina said from where she had stationed herself with her back to a wall and a clear line of sight to everyone in the room. “I am not going anywhere with Tinkerbelle and his partner, Slinky the Super-Slut. I agreed to work with you two because there’s no other way to get this case solved, and I still only halfway believe in vampires. But I am not going into a firefight with a couple of…of…whatever you are at my side!”

  Phil crossed to her quicker than anything I’d ever seen. I mean, he made me look positively glacial. He literally flew to her side and whispered something in her ear. She pulled back, tears in her eyes, and slapped at him. He caught her wrist and looked deep into her eyes. A long moment passed with them just staring at each other. I shot a glance over to Greg, but he just shrugged. Apparently he hadn’t been able to overhear, either. After a few more interminable moments, Sabrina sagged a little and Phil let go of her hand. “Now can we go?” He asked quietly, and for just a second Phil didn’t look like the self-righteous jerk I’d come to know and half-despise. He looked like he must have before he fell, kind, peaceful, caring. I didn’t like it, so I was happy when his normal sneer came back.

  “Are you okay?” I asked Sabrina.

  “No. But let’s go. Whatever is going on, we need to finish it.” She hurried up the steps ahead of everyone. I really, really wanted to make some crack to Phil about taking a sword to a gunfight, but after his little encounter with Sabrina, even I didn’t feel like making a joke. We followed, Greg and I stopping at the closet to gear up. I wasn’t sure how much good my guns would do in this mess, but it made me feel better to strap them on regardless.

  Of course, there was another surprise waiting for us at the top of the stairs. Mike was leaning on the front fender of his car, and I shot Greg a look. “Hey!” He exclaimed, “I didn’t call him. I promise!”

  “I’m no idiot, Jimmy-boy. I knew you wouldn’t be able to come out before nightfall, so I did a little research on our demon, and thought you might like to know exactly what it is that we’ll be facing tonight.”

  “Not we, buddy. You’re staying home.”

  “Not likely, old friend.”

  “This is not a matter for discussion.”

  “Then let’s not discuss it. I’m going with you, and when you hear what I have to say, you’ll agree that you need all the help you can get.”

  I could see that I had no chance of changing his mind until he had at least told me what he came here for, so I said, “Alright, shoot.”

  “Now, you told me that the demon identified herself as Belial. Well, having certain resources at my disposal that most people do not, I went back to the church and did a little research. I did not like what I found, and I doubt you will, either. Belial is one of the most powerful of the second-tier demons. She is the child of Baal, one of Lucypher’s Archdukes. Baal is the ruler of the seventh circle of Hell, which houses the most violent of sinners. All the murderers, rapists, suicides and blasphemers end up in the seventh circle, and Baal has complete dominion over them. That wasn’t a power that came to him by an appointment, or a vote, he’s simply the meanest, nastiest demon in all of Hell.”

  “And Belial is Daddy’s little girl?”

  “Exactly. Legend has it that she is the offspring of Baal and the Whore of Babylon.”

  “Wow. And I thought I had Daddy issues. So what does this mean?”

  “If Belial brings Baal to earth, then he would have complete dominion over this realm, just like he does over the seventh circle. Baal is a force of nature, a creature so powerful that even the angels fear his power. If the ritual completes and the sun rises on Baal in this world, then the entire world will belong to him. He will, in effect, create a Hell on earth.”

  They’re right. Ignorance really is bliss.

  Chapter 30

  “All the more reason why you’re staying here. I will not be responsible for taking you into a gunfight with a demon.”

  “Bite me. And I mean that figuratively, of course,” was his smug reply.

  “Seriously, Mike. We can’t take you with us. It’s too dangerous. I don’t know what I’d do if anything happened to you.”

  “Nothing’s going to happen to me. And regardless, I’m a grown man. I get to make all kinds of bad decisions for myself. I can drink a little too much, eat too much red meat, and consort with undead creatures if I so choose. And really, is this going to be significantly more dangerous than having my two best friends be vampires?”

  “Yes. Because we’ve never wanted to kill you. Strangle you a little, but never really kill you. If what you’re saying is true, this demoness is far more dangerous than anything we’ve ever faced outside of a video game.”

  “So how do you plan on handling her if she’s so…” Mike’s voice trailed off as he got his first good look at the rest of our entourage. “Oh. So now you can consort with demons, but I’m not good enough to come with you?” His voice was cold, and the look he gave me was heavy with disappointment, and something else I couldn’t quite figure, maybe fear?

  “I’m not consorting with them, Mike, I’m using them. They’re tools, and just like a cheap hammer, they’re tools that I don’t care about. You, I care about. I don’t give a rat’s ass if Phil doesn’t make it out of this alive, assuming he’s technically alive now, but you’re one of my best friends. And I only have two friends, so I can’t afford to lose any of you. So please, I’m begging you, don’t give me any grief, just stay home.”

  “No. I’m going with you, and I’m old enough to be stubborn about it. So who’s riding with the holy man?” He raised his voice on the last so that everyone else could hear him.

  Greg yelled “Shotgun!” and hopped in the passenger seat. I shot him a look, shot another one at Mike, and went to get in Sabrina’s car. Phil and Lilith started toward Mike’s car, but at a look from the priest the fallen angel and his servant changed direction and wordlessly got in the back seat of Sabrina’s sedan.

  “Don’t you two have a car?” I asked.

  “No.” Lilith answered simply.

  “Then how did you get here?” I asked. There was silence in the car for a long moment, then I continued. “I don’t want to know, do I?”

  “No,” repeated Lilith. We rode in silence across town to the school and pulled into the far end of the parking lot. Sabrina popped the trunk and pulled out a pair of pistol-grip twelve gauge shotguns. She handed one to me and started loading oddly colored shells into hers.

  “What are those?”

  “Bean-bag rounds. Non-lethal, but they’ll take almost anyone out of the fight. Plenty here for you, too. Let’s try not to kill any civilians if we can help it.”

  “I don’t mind that in concept, but in practice, the civilians are likel
y to be the only things we can kill. I’ve got a bad feeling about whatever is in there waiting for us.”

  “Me too.” She looked pensive, and I reached out to touch her arm.

  “Hey. It’ll be okay. We’re the good guys, we always win.” I tried to manage a smile filled with bravado and cocky charm, but I think I looked more like I was about to puke. I felt more like I was going to puke, for sure. And as our motley crew of heroes and sometimes villains made our way across the parking lot, I felt worse and worse. Looking at Greg, he was getting a decidedly green cast as well, and Phil and Lilith looked even worse. We were about twenty yards from the entrance to the school gym, where a huge banner hung proclaiming “Fall Carnival for Christ! – No HELL-oween here!”

  “Ahhh, crap.” I said. “We’ve got a problem.” I waved everybody together. Sometime between leaving our place and getting to the school, Phil and Lilith had changed their outfits into something more early 2000’s yuppie than late ‘80s goth porn. Since they’d been in the back of the same car I was in, and I hadn’t seen anything, I didn’t ask how they managed that trick. More things I really didn’t want to know.